To Science!

If I remember correctly from high school science, when you set out to prove a theory it goes hypothesis-experiment-conclusion. There may have been some other stages involved, but like most of the crap I learned in high school, that's been long since forgotten. At any rate, this week we here at Expecting Rain Labs were testing whether there is such a thing as too much baseball. Purely in the interest of science, I decided to attend three baseball games in three cities in five days. Let's get ready to learn!

My Equipment: nosebleed seats, Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, trusty Sox hat, $7 draft beer, Bunsen burner, other sundry items.

Day 1: Oakland, CA. Angels vs. Athletics.
Observations: The Coliseum is not the decrepit pile of crap that I was expecting. The A's fans are few but devoted, more importantly you can bring your own beer into the stadium. Vlad Guerrero is a scary, scary man. Barry Zito's pants are worrisomely tight (aren't you concerned about sperm count, Barry?).
Result: Anaheim 6, Oakland 1

Day 4: Washington, DC. Nationals vs. Marlins.
Observations: RFK Stadium is the worst place in America to watch major league baseball. Despite the many "W" hats, can any of the Washington faithful name a single Nats reliever? Miguel Cabrera turned 22 on game day and makes approximately 10 times what I do. Is Dontrelle Willis the most exciting player in baseball?
Result: Florida 9, Washington 4

Day 5: Baltimore, MD. Orioles vs. Tigers.
Observations: Sammy Sosa doesn't seem to have the same pop in his bat that he did last year (how curious). I should have signed Miguel Tejada to my fantasy team (one more home run that could have been mine). On the mound, Sidney Ponson looks like Curly Howard in a pair of stirrup pants. Camden Yards pretty much beats the crap out of the Coliseum and RFK. My presence at the game does not in fact mean the home team loses. Take that, Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle! Beer man, another Miller Lite!
Result: Detroit 4, Baltimore 8


Conclusions: As to the question of whether there is such a thing as too much baseball, I can only conclude that too much is never enough.