How I Spent My Summer Vacation: '05 edition

Well, actually Summer/Fall of the glorious year 2005. But anyways, visual evidence has now surfaced from both the major projects I worked on: the award-winning A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints and Harvey Keitel-starrer A Crime. C'mon and taste the glory.

Kansas Man Shoots Himself in Groin

You'd think the headline says it all, but you would be wrong. Though this AP wire article provided precious little information about the botched kidnapping that precipitated the self-eunichization, if you read the paragraph you'll see that after shooting himself in the testicle, he then managed to shoot himself again in the thigh. That really seals the deal for me. It takes a very special combination of bravado and incompetence to shoot oneself twice.

Missed It By That Much

Compensating?

It's not very often that one can say they missed by a fraction of an inch and mean it. Yet this literally happened to me yesterday at trivia night at a bar on Lexington. The question was, "According to Harry Callahan, what is the most powerful handgun in the world?" The answer can be found in the comments section, but suffice to say that when I answered ".45 Magnum" I was incorrect.

This egregious error totally wiped out my previous gains in pride from knowing the weight of a ping pong ball and which Bond film the character "Pussy Galore" appears in. It haunts me to this day.

Man Bites Panda

Need I say more?

Jericho

How sad is it, in terms of Skeet Ulrich's career, that the TV promos for his new show "Jericho" don't even mention his name? CBS feels that the name of this one-time, reasonably well-known character actor means so little that just printing his name would mean nothing. From the promos, it's clear that he's a major character in the show; is the network just depending upon the rabid viewership of a segment of the audience who know Skeet Ulrich by sight?

Say It Ain't So, Harold

Harold Reynolds, former Gold Glove second baseman and leading light of the 1980s Mariners has gotten shit-canned from his steady gig at Baseball Tonight. The charge: sexual harassment. His defense: it was just a hug.

I don't know about the accusations, but for HR to get canned so abruptly the charge must have been a little more drastic than a overly-cosy hug. I will miss his astute observations and amusing "can you believe this guy?" banter with John Kruk. Hopefully it's all a misunderstanding and HR can go back to demonstrating how to properly lay down a bunt whilst wearing a suit.

My Life Begins Today

Well, actually it begins on July 18th, when Briscoe County, Jr. is released on DVD. Lo, it's been a long 12-years since we last glimpsed the chin-related stylings of Bruce Campbell as the eponymous title character. I'm counting the minutes. Now if they'd only release Duckman, my life would be complete